Hi all. For my new visitors, I apologize in advance for this post . . . It's definitely a little Too Much Information, but my blog has always been about my journey, mostly art, but personal stuff overlaps sometimes. This is a personal post and I'll be posting art stuff later on Wednesday. I'm very open about what is going on in my life, usually, but try to hold back a bit from personal stuff - I don't a lot of the time because of my openness, but I try.
Anyway, many of you regular visitors know, I am 43 and relatively healthy and happy. But, to be candid, I'm having some female issues that are really taking their toll on me. I have had some ovarian cysts for three years that have caused some concern lately. I had a pap smear in August and it was normal and then had an MRI and pelvic ultrasound which revealed there are more cysts and the tests need to be repeated in about two weeks to decide what to do about them. I was feeling fine and not too worried until September and started having my "monthly visitor" every other week. Now I have had it pretty much constantly and very heavy for the last five weeks and I find myself exhausted. I keep trying to talk myself out of it and that it will all straighten out, but I am just plain old tired, like more tired than I have ever been in my life, with the exception of those first few baby weeks twice (2 kids). I have reached the point the last two days I feel I can't fake it anymore and it's not going away and I just have to let you all know I am not myself. I have calls in to get authorization to see a specialist and hopefully get this taken care of soon, but just wanted you to know that I am having trouble keeping all of the balls I used to juggle in the air now. I am so tired, I find it harder and harder to blog visit, make art, answer emails, or do things that require actual thinking beyond what is absolutely necessary to stay afloat. Coming up with original ideas is the hard part. Etsy is going fine and chore like things I can stay on top of, but mental effort is really not going well for me. I am a very determined person, so some days I pull it off and others I just have to give up. I'm not overly concerned. I think it's just one of those things some of us have to go through in our 40's (my mom had the exact same thing happen at 42) and it will get taken care of pretty routinely once we get the ball rolling. So forgive my absences and flakiness and lack of visiting. I will work through this and all will be fine soon. Thank you!