Nov 17, 2009

TMI

Hi all. For my new visitors, I apologize in advance for this post . . . It's definitely a little Too Much Information, but my blog has always been about my journey, mostly art, but personal stuff overlaps sometimes. This is a personal post and I'll be posting art stuff later on Wednesday. I'm very open about what is going on in my life, usually, but try to hold back a bit from personal stuff - I don't a lot of the time because of my openness, but I try.

Anyway, many of you regular visitors know, I am 43 and relatively healthy and happy. But, to be candid, I'm having some female issues that are really taking their toll on me. I have had some ovarian cysts for three years that have caused some concern lately. I had a pap smear in August and it was normal and then had an MRI and pelvic ultrasound which revealed there are more cysts and the tests need to be repeated in about two weeks to decide what to do about them. I was feeling fine and not too worried until September and started having my "monthly visitor" every other week. Now I have had it pretty much constantly and very heavy for the last five weeks and I find myself exhausted. I keep trying to talk myself out of it and that it will all straighten out, but I am just plain old tired, like more tired than I have ever been in my life, with the exception of those first few baby weeks twice (2 kids). I have reached the point the last two days I feel I can't fake it anymore and it's not going away and I just have to let you all know I am not myself. I have calls in to get authorization to see a specialist and hopefully get this taken care of soon, but just wanted you to know that I am having trouble keeping all of the balls I used to juggle in the air now. I am so tired, I find it harder and harder to blog visit, make art, answer emails, or do things that require actual thinking beyond what is absolutely necessary to stay afloat. Coming up with original ideas is the hard part. Etsy is going fine and chore like things I can stay on top of, but mental effort is really not going well for me. I am a very determined person, so some days I pull it off and others I just have to give up. I'm not overly concerned. I think it's just one of those things some of us have to go through in our 40's (my mom had the exact same thing happen at 42) and it will get taken care of pretty routinely once we get the ball rolling. So forgive my absences and flakiness and lack of visiting. I will work through this and all will be fine soon. Thank you!
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29 comments:

Caity said...

Marsha, much sympathy. I went through a lot of pain (and a heck of a lot of pads etc!) with cysts and severe endometriosis and adenomyosis, before finally having a total abdominal hysterectomy, bilateral oopherectomy and salpingectomy in August 2008.

It's taken until my most recent blood test to be officially NOT ANAEMIC, yay! I was miserable for a long time before the surgery, and apart from those first few days of post-operative pain, I've never regretted it. Not saying in any way that it is the only option, but it was the right one for me - and I hope you find the right one for you, soonest.

Sending you all the best!

(PS - now that I am post-menopausal instead of spending money on tampons I spend money on getting my chin waxed. Hormones are such swings and roundabouts affairs!)

Leslie said...

I can TOTALLY empathize with what you are going through. Thanks for sharing. I'll continue to send strong positive energy across the country to you...

Moniqui said...

Just sending you a big hug and hoping you will be back to feeling happy and healthy soon! Take care!

Jamie said...

Hang in there Sweetie!!! I hope you can see the specialist soon and make sure you are taking an iron supplement. I am so sorry you have been dealing with this and thank you for sharing it with us. A burden shared is always lighter:) Love You Sweet Friend, Jamie

Terri Kahrs said...

Ohhh, Marsha! I KNEW something was up! You have my empathy and sympathy - I've had ovarian cysts and endometriosis, so I know the level of hell you're on right now.

Do yourself a favor - along with tests for anemia, have the doctor do a thyroid hormone level test. It's a very long story, but TRUST me. That test literally saved my life. I'm sending lots of love and many good thoughts! Love, Blessings & Hugs, Terri xoxo

Joy said...

Praying and thinking of you Marsha. Hope things get straightened out soon.

Jill said...

Dear Marsha, best wishes winging their way round the world to you. I am sure all will be sorted - being a woman can be a right b*****, but worrying about your blog is unnessecary. We are all behind you and any little posts will be gratefully read but take it easy. (:

sharon said...

Once again Marsha, health is the most important thing, and I am praying for you that everything will work out fine! Take care of yourself FIRST!

whymsicalmusings said...

Marsha what a horrible thing to live with. I had female problems from the time I started until 2001 when I had my Hysterectomy. The bleeding wears you down and makes it hard to think.
I am so sorry you are dealing with this....there is a light at the end of the tunnel if you have surgery and all is removed LIFE IS WONDERFUL!!!! All of the pain and hormonal craziness leaves:)I have PCOS and still deal with hormonal issues but life is so much better!
Keeping you in my prayers.
XXXX
Becky

Renee (nayski) said...

So sorry you've been feeling so crappy Marsha. I'm glad you're taking care of it (finally) and hope you'll be back visiting us soon. Sending love & prayers your way.
xx

Stacey said...

{{HUGS}} and prayers that you can get in to see a specialist and on your way to feeling better really soon!!!

Tina said...

Hugs to ya Marsha!! I know just what your feeling! Been there and done that and the T-shirt ain't worth it..you'll be back on track soon..big hugs,t

thekathrynwheel said...

Hope you feel loads better soon. Take some time out, the blogs and your art will wait for you. Listen to your body - it seems like it's telling you to rest and sleep :-)
Kate

aliceinparis said...

Marsha, poor you... I suffer with that too but nothing as severe as What you are going through now.
I hope you are taking iron supplements, very important. My doc does ferritin tests on me every so often to make sure my iron levels are not too low.(they measure your iron stores, not hemoglobin)
Wishing you all the best and speedy relief from your troubles. xoxox

Brenda Grace said...

Love and Hugs xxxx

Linda Cain said...

Been there, done that, no T-chirt, but felt much better. And I was 46.

Be Well again my Friend,

Linda

Caity's post was a riot!!!

Cathy said...

marsha, just a note that i'll keep you in my prayers.
you may/may not know i suffer from chronic pancreatitis + diabetes...long story but i suffered the exhaustion you are experiencing for years, all to say: rest as much as you need, no apologies, and do what it takes to get all better :)
sending you hugs and prayers!

Janny said...

Take good care of yourself. I know what you are talking about, it's terrible. Hang in there and all the best! xoxo

Ocean Lotus said...

the important thing is health, not keeping up with your blog, emails and such...take care of you...

Kim Mailhot said...

Take good care of you, Marsha. That is our real job here, you know, because no one else can do that for us. Use that light of love that you have all around you from all of us who care about you, and make yourself strong and well.
You are in my prayers and warm thoughts, Lovely One.

vintagesusie said...

Sweet Marsha,
So sorry your feeling yucky, nothings worse then not being up to par around the holidays. I know if it were me not feeling good, I would surround myself with your amazing art & SMILE right through the day!!! Keep your chin, hopefully this is just a bump in the road. :)

Julia said...

Hugs Marsha and take your rest! I think of you !!

Kelly said...

sorry to hear you are not feeling well and going through some stuff at the moment. hope you can get it solved really soon. take care my friend.

patti said...

Get plenty of rest Marsha I hope your specialist gets this all sorted. I have dealt with bone shattering fatigue myself due to some health issues I had, and I know just how you feel.

The hardest part for me was to make others understand how much the fatigue effected my brain functioning. Take things slowly and make your self a priority. Take Care.

Jules said...

Oh dear - I hope you feel stronger soon. Please take care of yourself, sleep, sleep, sleep, and if that specialist appointment isn't soon enough call every day until they make it sooner. {{{Big hug}}} Juli

Lorrie Grainger Abdo said...

Marsha, Best wishes and I know where you are coming from. I agree with the gal that suggests having your thyroid tested. Read the book Thyroid Power and don't let your doctor tell you that your thryoid level is "normal" without some additional testing. Everyone's "normal" is different. Check into adrenal burn out too. Extreme fatique and mental fog are both symptoms. I know about these things first hand and got my life back three years ago. My creative life got juiced up at the same time my physical condition improved.

Lorrie Abdo

julie Haymaker thompson said...

Hey Sweet We are here!! This is not good and I fear my dear that you may have a few more hurdles to pass to get thorough this. I am thinking you need surgery and NOW!!! I know it is the holidays but this is wiping you out!!! One cannot just lose blood and not feel "literally" drained. Keep us posted. We are very concerned my dear!!! hugs Julie Oh and THANKS for shairng this with us

Marleen said...

This is really GREAT, wowow, I love it! Very unique and creative!

Elena Lai Etcheverry said...

My dear friend. I was just getting caught up on your blog and I am so sorry to hear what is going on with you. I hate limbo. not knowing what is happening, not know what is going to happen. I am sending you a ton of healing positive energy and I know whatever it is, it will be ok. I so appreciate your kind words and comments on my blog. I am here for you friend.