Have you seen the movie
Runaway Bride? It's one of my favorite light hearted girl movies. It has nothing to do with the image below but everything to do with my mind at the moment. I swear the whole world that knows me will think I have lost my mind.
At the risk of that, I have had yet another shift in thinking tonight. I am hoping that all these changes of heart, all of these twists and turns I seem to be making are eventually going to direct me back to the path I am supposed to be on. I have had yet another change of heart tonight. Well, it's been coming on for a few days but I couldn't deny it any longer tonight. I am a runaway crazy person.
In the movie, the bride keeps committing to get married and has a last minute change of heart and can't seem to say "I do". I keep saying I'm going to do things and it gets down to it and I can't say "I do" to it, or I say "I do" and then I don't want to. So, the nitty gritty is . . . tonight I think I am not going to sell collage sheets anywhere at all.
I feel so goofy writing any of this as if the world is hanging on my every word to find out . . . I know that is not the case. But, I always give the details here, the honest part of the journey. And the honest part right now is that I think I need to just make art, not collage sheets. I just can't seem to do both well at once and I am not done making art. I have so many things I want to do and figure out. I think I've just had a hard time finding my "home" since my dad died. I have had a hard time feeling "home" inside myself and I think that needs to be explored in making art, and in a less shared experience.
Selling collage sheets kind of shares the creating experience, I am figuring out, and that has it's importance and its time and place. But for now, I think I need to concern myself with just my own insides, my own imagery, to help me get back on track, back on the path, back "home". So, I'm running away again.
This piece below, is another quickie digital collage . . . it has nothing to do with running, but I think I relate to this feeling of "here we go again" absurdity I see in it . . . complete boredom with myself.
Aye, aye, aye
copyright by Marsha Jorgensen 8/9/2010. All rights reserved.
All images are my own creation.